Maids’ title hopes took a dent last week, as they lost top spot by losing to Banbury, whilst ever-consistent Old Pats won yet again, to reclaim pole position in SW1. A lacklustre last start from Maids, coupled with a blistering first 20 minutes from Banbury saw them 17-0 down at half time, quickly going 20-0 down, and then 1 man down, leaving them a mountain to climb. It was an admirable fight back, which saw 3 tries scored with no reply, but sadly they couldn’t overturn the deficit against James Kerr’s in-form Bulls, and they lost out 20-17. They now trail Old Patesians by 2 points, with 10 games to go, including the challenge of another in-form side, Chippenham, who arrive at Braywick tomorrow, in confident mood, after they dispatched Witney 31-3 a week ago.

Chippenham play off a solid set piece, and the usually reliable Maids scrum will be severely tested tomorrow, as reports indicate it’s an area where they are very strong. Luke Corbett dons the number 3 shirt, and will be up against Maidenhead skipper, Myke Parrott upfront, whose unsuccessful post Xmas diet has seen his weight disappointingly escalate. Dom Birch must shoulder the majority of the blame for this raise, following his insistence on seconds after training, including extra sausages on Tuesday, and 4 pieces of naan bread last night.

Out wide, brothers Lewis and Ryan Surry play at scrum half and centre respectively, with Ryan captaining the side from number 12, whilst Dom Riccio at fly-half is a dangerous player, who will need to be carefully marshalled by the Maidenhead back row.

After impressing last week, upon his return to 1st team duty off the bench, winger Mike Burnett starts his first game since October, and we caught up with him this week, to ask some deep and insightful questions…

*Nickname(s)? Mikey B, Ted, Teddy, Cheese.

*Occupation? Management Consultant

*Position? Usually just plain old missionary on the physio bed. Back 3 when fit.

*Former clubs? Maids, Weston-Super-Mare, Clifton, Maids.

*Biggest rugby achievement to date? Getting promoted to Nat 3 with Maids, and starting for Clifton in Nat 2.

*Favourite food? Bangers and mash

*Dream woman/man? Linda, in the kitchen.

*Which Maids teammate would you least like to be stuck in a lift with, and why? Any of you ‘orrible little things, who think it’s ok ** **** *** *** on each other. Only my mother does that to me. Other than that, Whitey, he’s been to some dark places in Kazakhstan.

*What do you want to achieve this season? Knee replacement and promotion.

Thanks to Will Greenwood for organising the visit from a psychologist last night, sadly, after being present during Will Cadden’s session, he now requires therapy himself, so has absconded to a Sky-sports sponsored retreat to recover, and so misses the game. Paul Britton is welcomed back to the starting line up this week, whilst Nic Jones extends the prison bars on his shed, with Lewis Jones switching to hooker. Christoph Bart is back in the starting line up, after playing his part in the recent revival of the red-light economy in Amsterdam, and Scott Prince is expected to recover from the belt whipping dished out by his father for losing last week. Ed Keohane has been suspended, for sending daily nudes to forwards coach, Mark Bates, so is out for another week.

Maids team:

  1. Parrott (c)
  2. L Jones
  3. Britton
  4. Emmanuel
  5. Churchyard
  6. White
  7. Macauley
  8. Long
  9. Hill
  10. Thompson
  11. Prince
  12. Hannigan
  13. Bart
  14. Burnett
  15. Finnie
  16. Marriott
  17. Dance
  18. Childerhouse

Chippenham team:

  1. Riley
  2. Turner
  3. Corbett
  4. Bye
  5. Angell
  6. Hendy
  7. Clark
  8. Clilverd
  9. Surry
  10. Riccio
  11. Parry
  12. Surry
  13. Johnson
  14. Doggett
  15. Taylor
  16. Larrimore
  17. Ascott
  18. Douglas

Come on you Maids!