After a much-welcomed week off for the 1st XV last round, the boys are back in action, and back at Braywick, as newly-promoted Newbury Blues, make the relatively short jaunt across Berkshire. Registering just a solitary victory so far this campaign, the Blues will be desperately hoping to get their season back on track, after a disappointing 28-16 home loss to bottom team, Launceston last Saturday.

Toby Holland at outside centre is one of various changes in the Blues side this week, and is part of an exciting backline, that also features the returning Jamie Futcher on the wing, replacing James Lewis, who drops to the bench. Dan Thorne skippers the side from number 12, and it’s his left peg which has been the source of so many points for the visitors already this term.

Upfront, the influential Kyle Doel misses out, so Josh Winfield moves from the back row to lock, and Jack Walsh takes his place at blindside, with the other change at hooker, which sees experienced Robbie Drysdale start alongside Hicks and Macaulay.

It is a much-changed Maidenhead team that run out this week, after the nail-biting victory at Launceston, and one lad making his first start in over a year, after injury, is former Maids Colt, Jack Hill. The hippie-bashing, right-winged, bin bag enthusiast has enjoyed a busy week, beating up Extinction Rebellion activists with his Dad, but he had a quick break this morning, so answered a few questions for us…


Name- Jack Hill

Nicknames- “Hilly”, “2 pill Hill”, “ Amber Hill’s brother”, “Tommy Robinson”.

Occupation- Bin bag Social Secretary, and currently trying to defraud people into buying holidays off me. Amber Hill’s brother.

Position- 9. Mrs is a 10.

Biggest rugby achievement to date- playing 3 consecutive games of rugby, having a run out at Twickenham with Berkshire under 20s.

Favourite food- anything British- fry ups, sausage and mash, pie and chips. Nothing foreign.

Dream Woman/Man- Tommy Robinson or Nigel Farage.

Which Maids teammate would you least like to be stuck in a lift with and why? Simsim and Laurence Leonard. The sooner Boris the Great gets this Brexit deal done, the better. Sick of these Jolly Foreigners coming over here and complaining about me and my Dad’s racist football chants at midnight on a Monday.

What do you want to achieve this season? Try to stay injury free, and avoid any other players nicking my girlfriend.


Dave ‘Calories’ Cole, who picked up Man of the Match against Launceston, after a fabulous display of walking rugby, keeps his place, and will have Ross Muil and Will Macaulay doing his running for him this week, after they both missed the last fixture, through mild heartilage strains. Olly Foxley is back starting at full back, after impressing Head Coach, Mobbs at the Maidenhead Festival last weekend, where he starred for the under 8s, and Eric Blewitt returns from Polish International duty to start on the wing.

Andy Berry was delighted to be back in training on Tuesday, after struggling to find anything to whinge about, with no game last Saturday, and he’ll pack down in the 2nd row with Sam Churchyard, who has managed to get his picture on the front of the programme after emailing Boughy and Gareth directly, and going over Geoff Cowen’s head…

Laurence ‘Bin Juice’ Leonard, continues to fleece his local club in Ireland, and for some reason they still pay for him to fly back every weekend. At least he doesn’t have a girlfriend to worry about now, after his recent squeeze Kerrie, not only ditched him, but then deleted all evidence of ever even knowing him (check out her Instagram). In the kitchen, Big Dom Birch will be hoping his latest new recruit, ‘Chef Gary’, lasts longer than Spicy Roger, who still maintains medium rare is the best way to serve fried pork chops.

We extend a warm welcome back to Mark Darlington, who makes his long-awaited return from injury, starting at hooker, and would like to say a massive congratulations to Sam Churchyard, who earns his 100th 1st XV cap. Well done Churchy, here’s to many more!

“100 caps- congratulations Churchy”

Maids team (caps in brackets)

  1. M Parrott (c) (204)
  2. M Darlington (37)
  3. E Mandozzi (17)
  4. S Churchyard (100)
  5. A Berry (28)
  6. R Muil (38)
  7. W Macaulay (57)
  8. D Cole (47)
  9. J Hill (31)
  10. W Runciman (44)
  11. S Prince (57)
  12. E Keohane (118)
  13. B Mitchell (3)
  14. G Blewitt (21)
  15. O Foxley (18)
  16. D Hostetler (6)
  17. S Hallett (33)
  18. N Crossley (28)


Newbury team:

  1. B Hicks
  2. R Drysdale
  3. J Macaulay
  4. A Neal
  5. J Winfield
  6. J Walsh
  7. D Stewart
  8. A Millar
  9. T Hunt
  10. A Bancroft
  11. J Futcher
  12. D Thorne
  13. T Holland
  14. H North
  15. T Thorne
  16. G Robinson-Slater
  17. C Bird
  18. J Lewis


Come on you Maids!